A virgin should be treated like a deity!

A virgin should be treated like a deity!


Dear Aunty Temilolu,

I will be 34 this year but still single. This was because I made a decision to abstain from sex until marriage. This has made men run away from me after one to three months of dating because I won’t give them what they want. I am not 100% clean because I have kissed few frogs and it has not exceeded that because I have never been sexually involved with a man. 

There is one particular guy who has always been off and on for almost three years now, hoping that one day, I will give in to him. He even said I should not use my abstinence rule to lose the man God destined for me. I told him that if he really valued me, he should do the needful, then he would enjoy the package all his life. He said that he needed to taste what he wanted to buy and if I got pregnant, he would come for my hand in marriage. This present generation of men want tested, okayed, and certified women before marriage. Why I am telling you all this is because sometimes, I want to give up but I remember God’s promise in my life and I brace up.

Also, when I see my friends or younger ones getting married or just being delivered of babies, I tend to question God or want to reason giving in to advances. Most times when I reason agreeing to their terms, I always get scared, like what if I get pregnant and he refuses to marry me, then I will become a single mom left to cater to my child and myself. Ma, please I need your advice and prayers.

My very precious sister,

 I must commend your stance so far and I know God will never disappoint you because He’s committed to those who are committed to Him! At a time when a lot of 18-year-olds have slept with more men than their mothers and grandmothers, for you to remain a virgin at 34 is applaudable! I must also say it’s the height of disrespect for any man to tell a woman to get pregnant first then he’d proceed and ask for her hand in marriage, least of all tell a mature virgin that! Such a man can never treat a woman right; he would always lord himself over his wife and make her feel he’s her saviour! How disgusting! May our daughters never end up with such men!  We all know that there are more women than men and we’ve heard oftentimes even from the Bible in Isaiah 4:1 that a time would come when seven women would beg one man to marry them just to bear his name to take away their disgrace and shouldn’t even bother about what they would eat! I make bold to say that could be the fate of women who don’t know their God and what they can get from Him no matter the situation or adverse combination of circumstances they could be dealing with! God is super committed to those who are committed to Him and I tell you there’s one superman out there looking for you — one whom you won’t manage but would be a better version of your dream man and make you thank God every day of your life for keeping yourself till your wedding night, going through all those heartbreaks and ending up with a prince and one of God’s favorite children! I know what I’m talking about!


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