How to buy ‘Air Force One’

SONALA OLUMHENSE FROM PUNCH

Nigeria was in something of an uproar last week when they learned that in a supplementary budget proposal sent to the National Assembly, the government included N5.095bn for a presidential yacht.

A presidential yacht? The term does not exist in the Nigerian political lexicon. Although not a strange concept in advanced militaries, the modern yacht is the precinct of ultra-wealthy celebrities who seek the thrills of open waters in obscenely luxurious accommodations.

At the high end, the Russian billionaire, Alisher Usmanov, introduced ‘Dilbar,’ a monstrous, $800m, 512-feet superyacht, which has saloons, staterooms, spas, cinemas, a helipad and an 82-foot swimming pool. Amazon founder Jeff Bezos’ “Koru” is similar: a 417-foot, $500m superyacht that is served by a support super-boat, Abeona.

While the ordinary yacht may be cheaper than these marvels, it is not difficult to see how they might attract envy, or at least, admiration. In Nigeria, it is now part of our political discourse, courtesy of the appearance — reappearance, some say — of the word in Mr Bola Tinubu’s supplementary budget.

In a country riven by abject poverty and corruption in government, the national outrage was swift, with hostile indignation from the coast to the desert; on television, radio and social media; and from the streets to the boardroom.

The presidency, which has invested in an army of media relations personnel, took notice. It deployed spokesperson, Temitope Ajayi, to the war front with the story that it was the navy which had requested the expensive craft.

He blamed others as well. The budget office, he said, should explain to the public why such expenditure should be accommodated now, considering the economic situation of the country.

And he decried “the very simplistic way some of the line items are described by civil servants, who prepare the budget”.

And then, the mass media. “It is poor reporting to always reduce State House budgetary provisions to the President and Vice President,” he declared.

“When the State House makes provision for vehicles, it is reported as if it is the President that will use all the vehicles or eat all the food when a provision is made for food and catering services…”

Mr spokesperson, they most certainly can, they have, and — on the face of this evidence — they will. But that is not really the point. Because the first thing that is confessed by this denial of responsibility for the yacht proposal is that this government, like some others we have seen, is not only idle, but has literacy issues.

If it did any work, it would have prepared the supplementary budget rather than assign the responsibility to aliens in the Boys’ Quarters.

If the Presidency worked on the supplementary budget, it might have included in it, based on its experience of the last five months, what it really needed and what it needed it for. It did not. The supplementary budget was founded on greed, not need.

We know this because of the N28bn wall-to-wall provisions for renovations of the president and the vice-president’s homes and offices; in Abuja and Lagos; on land and in the air, including for the lavish purchase of unjustifiable luxury vehicles.